Return to the Red Death

This tale requires a wee bit of an explanation, back in 2004, as part of a Soul Food Cafe project,  I was to write an article on the Red Death ( a la, E. A. Poe’s tale, “The Mask of the Red Death”.  The first article is the one I wrote in 2004, the second one is the update I wrote in 2007.  

FATALITIES FROM THE RED DEATH RISE SHARPLY

by Gwen Myers

UPI: (Budapest, Transylvania). A mysterious illness is decimating Clan Dracül. The descendants of Vlad (the Impaler), once quite numerous, are dwindling at an alarming rate. Clan Dracül once flew at over 10,000 strong.

Due to fatalities from the ‘Red Death’, as it is being called, there are barely 2,000 adult Dracül able to take wing and feed. The Eldars and flightless young are the hardest hit by the Red Death. The Eldars feed least often and suffer the worst deaths from the disease. The young slowly die of starvation when the parents die of the Red Death.

Researchers, in lightproof laboratories, race to find a vaccine or cure while the population is still large enough to prevent inbreeding. Clan Dracül has not forgotten the horrors and sports that marred earlier generations, and does not wish to return to the era of infanticide and heartbreak.

The symptoms of the Red Death include deep red colouration of the face, difficulty in feeding, loss of primary and secondary fangs with concomitant inability to feed and death by starvation.

The only correlation found thus far is a possible similarity in the habits of food. A great number of the prey of Red Death fatalities are known among the prey as “Tweakers” and it is theorised that a commonality among the “Tweaker” prey may be the root cause.

As a precaution Clan Dracül members are advised to avoid prey that smell or behave abnormally. A strong medicinal smell or extreme restlessness seem to be signs of “Tweaker” prey and as such should be avoided.

There is a growing concern in the Council of Clan Dracül will need to create “New Blood” to remain vital and viable in the Vampyrric community. The persecutions and wholesale slaughter of the first “New Blood” search are fresh in the memories of all Vampyrric Clans. There has been enough intermarriage between European Vampyrric Clans that for Clan Dracül to survive, the “New Blood” search, may have to be undertaken soon.   

My friend Shiloh put this tale up on her website and I got an idea for a follow up article: 

 My friend Shiloh put this tale up on her website and I got an idea for a follow up article: 

(from the Transylvanian Journal of Vampyrric Medicine) 

CORRELATION AND CURE FOUND FOR RED DEATH

By Gwen Myers

 UPI: (Budapest, Transylvania) The Transylvanian Journal of Vampyrric Medicine  announced last Tuesday, 23, October, 2007 that the causative agent for the affliction known as “The Red Death” has been isolated, and a cure found for this scourge of the 21^st Century. 

The early theory of a commonality in the habits of prey proved to correct when researchers isolated the compound “Methamphetamine” from the blood of prey.  This is a recreational substance that is both highly addictive and destructive. 

Apparently the prey exhibits many of  the same symptoms as do the Vampyres, and the compound can cause fatalities amongst the prey. 

The intensive study isolated a treatment , beginning with the rare practice of both transfusions and hemodialysis of anyone exposed to the tainted prey, for not less than a full lunar month, and intravenous feeding until the individual is well enough to be fitted with a bridge of primary and secondary fangs. 

It is agreed that anyone who has ingested the tainted food be checked frequently for at least one calendar year to prevent  a relapse of the disorder. 

This treatment has even revived those Vampyres in the first stages of the Premature Hibernatory Phase Syndrome, once thought to be incurable.  As is commonly known, vampyres that suffer from Premature Hibernatory Phase Syndrome  will fall into the Hibernation phase of Vampyrism when they do not have the reserves to support their bodily functions and when the reserves are depleted the vampyre dies of starvation. 

This is a breath of hope for Clan Dracül, along with the offer from unrelated Clans the world over  to ally  their younger vampyres with Clan Dracül , both to swell their ranks, and prevent inbreeding as well as the need for a “New Blood” search. 

Even with this miracle, Clan Dracül may take centuries to regain their pre-Red Death size of 10,000 on the wing.

So, You Want A Scary Movie??

       #-One of the 8 Films 2 Die 4    

       *- More Than One Copy

       + Also own the book  

American Psycho *- You cannot help but be glued  to this one, even though it is over 2 hours long.    Disturbing, realistic, and well-performed by the star.

Amityville Horror (new)- One of the very few remakes that impressed me.  The original version with James Brolin is still my favourite, it can scare the socks off you without special effects.

Assignment Outer Space

Astronaut’s Wife * Subtle, insidious and scary.  Brad Pitt is well-cast as the astronaut.  Can stand up to more than one watching.

Audrey Rose- How can you go wrong with this one?  The beautiful, haunted girl; and Anthony Hopkins as Audrey’s father.

Bad Seed, The- Still one of the scariest films I’ve seen, right up there with Psycho!!!

Bell, Book, and Candle – A perfect movie, definitely one to watch over and over!

Big Bad Wolf- Sick, funny, and played way over the top, not one for the little ones though.

Black Sheep- Hehehehehehe!!!!  One word… “Werewool”!!!! Brilliant film from New Zealand.

Blood and Chocolate-Utterly fascinating, sexy and yummy, destined to be one of the greatest werewolf films.  Does for werewolves what Gary Oldman did for vampyres.

Bram Stoker’s Dracula- How many people wanted to be bitten after seeing this??  I’ve watched it about 10 times and haven’t even started to get bored with it.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer * Such a charming premise! 

Canterville Ghost- Patrick Stewart is delightful as a ghostly curmudgeon.

Cell, The- Amazing on so may levels, the story is excellent, the premise believable, the acting is some of the best performances, the way the film is presented is perfect.  Another one to watch over and over.

Cellular- Wow.

Chiller

Chronicles of the Raven

Clearing, The

Corpse Bride, The- An animated musical that will charm you, and delight you.  Makes Goth a little more accessible to mainstream society.

Cosmic War of the Planets- Can we say “Creature Feature’ boys and girls?

Cujo +- This is one of the scariest dog films,period.

Cursed- The Werewolves are teenyboppers, again.

Danika

Dark Crystal, The- A good scary movie for the kids, how can you go wrong with Jim Henson’s Muppets?

Dark Ride#- A good show to watch in the dark, with popcorn and a macabre sense of humour!

Dead Birds

Death Race 2000- Camp, camp, camp!!  Sylvester Stallone’s very first film role.  I never tire of watching this and laughing helplessly.

Death Tunnel

Deliverance- Didn’t this one scare you silly too??

Demon

Demonic

Destroy All Planets

Don’t Say a Word *

Dream Catcher *  +  Those ____ Weasels!!!!  Eeeeeeek!!

Easy Virtue

Edward Scissorhands- Johnny Depp is stunning as the lead character, the film is surreal, funny, and charming.  I paid full price for this little goodie!!

Expecting Mercy

Exorcist * +- Hands down, one of the most terrifying films I have ever seen! 

First Born

Fright Night*- Another one for pyjama parties!!

From Hell *- Johnny Depp is again in his element as the man trying to catch Bloody Jack in London’s West End, excellent sets and story, I will be seeing it again.

Gamera the Invincible- One word- Drive-Ins!!!

Gamera vs. Monster X- Triple Feature Monster Movie Festival!

Gamera vs. Gaos- “The concession stand is now closing.”

Giant Gila Monster, The- A classic!!

Godzilla- Look out Raymond!!  AS good as the remake was, I still prefer the classic Godzilla.

Godsend- Mutant human-alien babies… bizarre end makes it worth watching.

Gojira- The real ‘original’ beastie.

Grudge, The- Even with subtitles, the original version is worth owning.

  

Halloween- Let the slashing begin!!!

Hannibal * +- Oh mannnnnnnn, Anthony Hopkins is amazing!!!

Hannibal Rising * +- This kid is going places, he is talented, savvy, and striking as a physical presence.

Hide and Seek

Howling*, The- NOt the best werewolf film available, but the story and the performances shine.

  

Identity *- A ‘Thinking’ man’s slasher film, John Cuzac is great, as are the rest of the cast.  I’ve seen it about four times already.

It  +- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!  I still don’t like clowns!!!!

Jacob’s Ladder *- Very well written, performed, and filmed, with stunning special effects it is a film that can keep you mesmerised.

Jamaica Inn

Jaws +- I still look at ocean swells and see that giahugic dorsal fin cutting silent and swift through them.

Jeepers Creepers -I dig the bat-creature!!!

Jeeper Creepers 2- Hold onto your spear-cannon, He’s back!

Labrynth *- Another film I can watch over and over.  David Bowie is as talented an actor as he is a musician, great for a family-friendly Halloween Party.

Lady In the Water *- One of M. NIght Shmalyan’s best tales.  I was glued to the film, and fascinated by the story, and the end left me feeling… glorified.  More than worth the 20$ U.S. that I paid for it.

Lawnmower Man +- A film to flop across your bed and watch in the dark, visually stunning and masterfully performed.

Legend of Hell House ~ A mid-70’s horror film, imported from across the big pond.  A must-see, especially in French, with the subtitles, it is far, far too funny to miss.

Maximum Overdrive +- AC/DC music and Emilio Estevez, perfect to go with a Stephen King tale of machines gone mad.

Mazes and Monsters

Mimic- “Mr. Funny Shoes Man”.

Monster from a Prehistoric Planet- “Mom?  I gotta go to the bathroom…”

Murders In The Rue Morgue + Edgar Allen Poe, need I say more?

My Little Eye

Mystic River *- Very good, another film thsy can stand up to more than one viewing.

Night of the Living Dead- Yes.  The original black and white version.

Omen*, The  (the Original)- How could anyone ever try to top Gregory Peck’s performance in this??

Others*, The- A ghost story of a different sheet!

Phantasm- Amyone who has seen this will remember the silver flying ball, and the ‘Tall Man’. shiver, shiver

Pick Me Up

Premonition

Prince of Darkness *- I can’t tell you how many time we have watched this, and never tire of it.  Alice Cooper is excellent in his role, and the story is believable.

Progeny, The- Another Evil-Mutant baby movie.

Pulse- I still haven’t worked up the nerve to watch it again!!

Ravenous

Red Dragon * +- Thomas Harris, Hannibal the Cannibal, and another psycho, who could ask for more to sink into the couch on a stormy evening?

Reincarnation #- Man do the Oriental countries make some awesome horror films!!!  They bring the best of their histories and cultures into every production.

Resident Evil*- Way cool, and good scare-ride from beginning to end.  Blessed with awesome special effects.

Riding the bullet +- Again, Stephen King, ’nuff said!

Rock, The- It may not be a ‘horror film’ per se, but the idea is scary as heck to me!!  Sean Connery and Nicholas Cage are well suited to their roles.

Room 1408- Even scarier than the ads!!  So good I forgot about the pause button on the remote and sat there with my mouth hanging open through the whole film.  John Cusack and  Samuel L. Jackson are excellent as always, and another Stephen King tale to boot!!

Rosemary’s Baby- “He has his father’s eyes.”

Rose Red *- A helluva haunted house tale, worth watching to the 2-DVD long movie!  Another Stephen King tale, it is always fun to watch for Stephen himself in his films.

Sabotage

Serpent and the Rainbow, The

Session 9 *-  Twisted, eerie, with great sets, and a tale that sticks with you long after you’re done watching the film.

Seven *- Brad Pitt, and Morgan Freeman shine in their roles(when don’t they?), the story is tight, and gets tighter through the whole film.

Severed- A movie to have a couple drinks with friends and laugh, with ther remote close at hand for the extra-gory scenes!!

Sight, The- Keanu Reeves and Jodie Foster are excellent in this film, I think I’ve seen it three times now.

Silence of the Lambs *, The- “I ate his liver with some Fava beans and a nice Chianti.”- Anothony Hopkins brought Hannibal the Cannibal into three-dimensional terrifying life.  Jodie Foster was, as always intense, and mesmering with her delicate beauty.

Silent Night, Bloody Night- HAhahahahahaha!!!!

Silent Hill_ Mum and I were watching this in the dark, and it scared me so bad I had to crawl into bed with Mum!!!

Silver Bullet +- Gary Busey and a werewolf, another good Stephen King tale!

Slash

Sleepers- Back to Stephen King we go!  Werecats, and pretty girls as their ‘prey’.

Someone is Watching

Species- I love this film, I think I’ve seen it a half-dozen times already and still love the interplay between the characters and the story too.

Stand, The + (the unedited version)- I think there should be one day a year where fans of the Stand can take the day off and park in front of the Big-screen watching this one!!  It scares the pants off you, and yet the end leaves you with a sense of optimism.

Stir of Echoes *- Kevin Bacon is excellent in this, with a subtle and hypnotic performance.  Another film worth buying to watch over and over.

Storm of the Century +- “Give me what I want and I’ll go away.”  Another Stephen King tale, a screenplay to be exact, and chillingly real.

Storm Tracker

Stranger, The  

Tales From the Darkside- Too much fun!!

Ted Bundy Story, The- Creepy enough, without the terrible fact that he was real.

Tell-Tale Heart, The + 

Thesis- Only available in Spanish, yet I was fascinated by the story, and even eatched it a second time.

Thirst, The

Tommyknockers * +, The- “Late last night, and the night before, Tommyknockers, Tommyknockers, knockin’ at my door.”

Tooth Fairy-Scarier than the title suggests.

Unrest#- Very good, worth more than one watching.

Undead- This Ozzie import is marvellous, I loved how some situations were portrayed!

Underworld- I wanted to be the first size 3X Death Dealer, how about you?

Underworld Evolution- One of the very few sequels that is as good as the original.

Unnamable- A campy tale of a succubus!

Urban Legend- A tongue-in-cheek slasher film.

Urban Legends- Dead Mary#- Hehehehe, I ave so much fun with the hapless people stranded in a remote cabin sort of spooky movies.

Vampires- A JohnCarpenter tale with some awesome action and special effects.

Virtuosity-WOW!!  A stunning technology gone wild film, the special effects are dizzying.

Voyage to the Prehistoric Planet- “Mom!!  The skeeters are bitin’ me!!”

Wait until Dark

War of the Monsters- “Are they all asleep yet honey?”

Warlock- A delightful tale of sorcery, time travel, and culture clash.  Julian Sands is right as a warlock, and does a difficult role justice.

Warning From Space- My brother and I have yet to be able to see all of this one, we laugh so hard we hve to stop the DVD so we can breathe!!!

Warriors of the Wasteland*-A spahetti sci-fi!!!!!

We All Scream For Ice Cream

When a Stranger Calls

White Noise- Goodness me!!!!  This one gave me the willies!!!

Willow- Altogether too charming to not buy, and another great film for family parties.  Val Kilmer is delightful in his role.

WishMaster

WishMaster 2

Witches of Eastwick, The- Doesn’t Jack Nicholson make an awesomely seductive devil??

Wolf *- Anpther amazing performance by Jack Nicholson, he portays an insidious descent into semi-bestiality.

Wolfen *  +- This is a Whitley Strieber tale well worth buying the book and watching the film.  Alber Finney, and Gregory Hines work so well toghether it is a delight to watch them in a scene together.

Yongary, Monster from the Deep- “Honey, why do let the kids watch these awful things??”

Young Frankenstein- Do I have to say anything??